Pushing past your limits

The only way you will ever know if you can do something is by trying it!

I returned from another week of walking one of the 6 routes of St. James way along the Camino de Santiago last week and I am still buzzing!

When people heard I was going to Spain, they presumed I would be wearing shorts and sunglasses to deal with the heat that is so often associated with the country, but not on this trip. On my first ever trip to walk from Sarria to Santiago in 2017, we had a heat-wave. It was overly hot for that time of year, even for the Spanish in the north of the country, walking in the heat can bring its own struggles, but us Irish basked in the sunshine as often as we could - an added bonus to our normal Irish weather. In 2018, also in April when walking this route of the Camino, we had the heaviest of rain, and floods covered many of the tracks, again being Irish and more used to the rain, we plodded on enjoying a different aspect of walking in the rain for nearly 20km each day.

This year, starting on the 2nd of April, we started walking from Ponferrada to Sarria, we had heard rumours that there was likely to be some snow, and from a distance we could see the mountain tops lightly dusted with snow, all very picturesque. On a journey, we seem to always want to know what is ahead of us, but for me, I like to be surprised along the way and by God were we surprised! For the first few days, we had normal weather, in that it was cold starting off, a hint of sunshine broke through the clouds in the afternoons and the evening temperatures dropped once the sun went down. The walking was made easier by the beautiful sights of little villages, trails of vines grew either side of us in many parts and meeting people was always greeted with ‘Buen Camino’.

On the day we walked from Herrieras to O Cebrerio we could see the large mountains in the distance that we were about to embark upon. I was excited at the thoughts of walking on a snow covered mountain and feeling the crisp air on my face. We started off with slight inclines which meandered into a forest trail that grew steeper as we walked. The sounds of the birds in the trees and the sunlight breaking through the morning sky created dancing shadows on my path, it made it feel like I was the only one there in that moment. I could see and hear my group just behind me, but for just a few minutes I took some time to just be present and absorb this earthly wonder. It also gave me time to breathe again, when you are walking up hills, you are focusing on keeping a rhythm to your steps and your breath. Sometimes you forget to do both!

After walking the first few kilometres, we are so grateful for the small cafes/casas that are nestled in the moutains, greeted by warm ‘olas’ and a café con leche. Removing some of the our outer layers and hats, we look like all the other travellers - everyone has hat hair, so you fit in well. There is a sense of community with other walkers, as they too know what you are feeling as you take this journey of miles for whatever reasons. Some are doing it in rememberance of a loved one who has passed, some are doing it as a spiritual journey to find themselves, others maybe for religious reasons and see this as a pilgrimage, for me it is about opening a gift every day and allowing the journey to fill my senses with sounds, sights and new people. It has become one of the greatest experiences of my life in that I realised after my first Camino that I am stronger than I had once believed, both physically, mentally and emotionally. Plus I love all the fun we have and get to go dancing the odd night! I also do it each year to fundraise for a local group in Tuam who have Multiple Sclerosis, I have had the privilege of facilitating mindfulness classes for them the past number of years and they all inspire me to be my best self each day and to be so grateful to put one foot in front of the other.

After our coffee break, everyone is eager to get back on the move and see where our next steps will take us, we headed up higher into the mountains and the sights that greeted us were like a picture postcard. Snow everywhere, the sky vibrant blue with clouds that looked like marshmallows and the air so crisp, as you breathe in you feel it is almost cleansing you. It really feels like a piece of heaven, whatever that is to you, but for me it was the peace and serenity of standing in nature having walked to get somewhere so beautiful, every step was worth it. The further we moved up, the heavier the snow became, snow drifts on either side of the trail and the sharp wind started to hit your exposed skin with a bit of a bite.

This was nothing compared to the next day, we started with heavy snow at the start of our trail and the Spanish must have thought these crazy Irish people couldn’t possibly want to walk in the blizzard! But we did. I must admit that I was a little anxious starting out as we couldn’t see very far in front of us, but it also excited me as it is something I have never done before and we were safe in the hands of our guides from Into the West Adventures. who organised our hotels, bags being transferred every day, guiding us every step and generally all round looking after us in any way they possibly could.

I sent a photo to my friend as we walked and she said we looked like we were on the run! Faces covered where only our eyes were peering out, but as the morning went on, we even had to cover our eyes as the hail was so big, it was hitting our eyes and making it hard to keep them open. The sunglasses were taken out of the bags after coffee as a protection tool from the hail and snow. It was exhilarating. It took all your energy to keep walking and to focus on your next step. It really made me mindful of the people in front and behind me and also to watch my footing in the snow covered ground. But like most Irish, we found humour in it and even sang whilst we walked, chatted and laughed often. By the end of that day we were all exhausted, we had come down to Triacastela - our final stop for the day and it lashed rain, so now we were soaked to the skin and looking like drowned rats. But you know what, we still smiled and the conversation over coffee, wine or a brandy that day was one of achievement. The group consisted of all ages, we are fit, but maybe we could have done with a bit more training (as we say we will do every year) but we did it! I looked around the table at my fellow walkers and felt so proud to be with them all. We all struggle at times along the trail and today was one of the toughest, but we made it.

I’m not going to give you a day by day account of the whole walking week as I could truly write a book on all I experienced, not just in sight and sounds, but in my thoughts and feelings. The Camino is a journey of a thousand steps (if using fit bit it will tell you exactly how many thousand a day!) but I don’t really need to know the number of steps I did, for me it is about knowing that each day I step out into the morning air and take that first breath, that the beauty of our world is there to be seen and only by taking time to explore it , will we truly see it in all its glory. When doing this, you allow yourself to be present in each amazing moment, there are times when you feel frustrated or sore, but you breathe through it, you get help from a fellow walker, whether it is in your group or a stranger that starts to chat as you keep each other company along the way. Many stories are shared with each other, sometimes tears, but always lots of laughter.

This trip like the other 3 camino trips I have done always remind me that I can achieve anything I set my mind to. I love the laugh, going out for dinner in the evenings with the group, having a few glasses of vino and sealing the day with shared stories , it seals the day with stories of loo stops in the bushes to listening to the people that have so much more to them than just what we see when first meeting. It’s the fact that I am out of my comfort zone and no matter who I am with sharing this experience, there will always be a special bond, even if you just chat with them for a few minutes or spend the week chatting along the way. We have shared an experience that has pushed us and we have pushed through it. We are constantly limiting ourselves with “I can’t”, but when I am on the Camino, I hear myself saying silently “I CAN”, it is my mantra on a daily basis.

The more we arm ourselves with the right words in our minds, the better equipped we are in dealing with all challenging situations, not just on the Camino. For me it has taught me valuable lessons about myself. I can do things on my own, but I do like the support of others. I like peace and quiet, but I also love the laughter and chatter of people around me. I don’t always have to put on a brave face for others and it is okay to say I am having a tough day. I read many signs along the way, hand-painted by fellow walkers and it always gave me a lift. We don’t know what is ahead of us on the Camino or in life, but along the way we can make it a little easier for ourselves and others by being more compassionate and kinder. Everything in life starts with just one step and we can only do it one step at a time.

I am returning again next year 18th to 25th April 2020 to do a new route, want to join me? Love Sharon xxxxx

To see Sharon’s next upcoming events or adventures please click here

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Attitude of Gratitude

Is being grateful really going to make a difference in your life?

For me, most definitely! Gratitude reminds me of all that I have in my life in the present moment. Instead of focusing on what I don’t have, I focus on what I do have. If you started listing in your mind right now all that you are grateful for, you might surprise yourself.

“But what about when you are going through a really hard time and everything seems to be going wrong?” This is a statement I hear from so many people, they tell me its’s okay to be grateful when life is going well, but it’s really tough when you are feeling overwhelmed by events out of your control. I hear you!

Life is a series of events that are positive and negative, over the years I have learned that most of my negative experiences led me to a place of healing and acceptance. They taught me to be grateful for each one and learned so much about myself. If it wasn’t for said experiences, I wouldn’t be the person I am today.

Of course when you are going through those challenging experiences, you are not grateful for them at the time. Let me give you an example. When we were told that my Sister was very unwell and was expected to die, we were in shock. As a family we came together to support her and be with her as much as possible. On seeing her fading away in front of our eyes, we knew that we were holding onto her, but deep down we knew she wasn’t going to survive this. I remember begging God to help her and that She really needed him right now! I now realise that the help she really needed was to let go and be at peace, she had fought long enough. Now, I give thanks everyday that She was in my life for 27 years and I still hold her in my heart. I now focus on what she gave me in life - unconditional love, and am so grateful that we were lucky enough to have her in our family.

Every time I walk now, I bring her with me in my mind and heart, when I am struggling to get up that hill or my back is acting up again, I remind myself to be grateful for my legs, they allow me to walk up the hill and keep me grounded in every challenge - my Sister could not walk. Each time I talk with my friends and family, I give thanks for a voice to speak , being able to express myself. My Sister was unable to speak but for one word she uttered, and that was “Mama”, and for that I am so grateful. She may not have said many words, but to hear her voice expressing this was what we will always hold dear.

“If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, ‘thank you,’ that would suffice.” – Meister Eckhart

Being grateful reminds you of what is truly important, during the hard times we tend to dwell on them and forget all the things that are going right. When we look around, we realise that our biggest blessings are the people in our lives.

One of the most commonly referenced research studies on gratitude was conducted by Emmons and McCullough in 2003. They split their research participants into three groups who were asked to list up to five things:

1. they were grateful or thankful for

2. that were struggles in their daily life

3. that simply happened

The participants didn’t describe or write about the events; they simply listed them. They did this daily for three weeks. After comparing the participants to themselves at the beginning of the experiment and to one another, Emmons and McCullough found several interesting relationships. The participants who wrote about what they were grateful or thankful for were found to have significantly:

• Emotional more resilient

• More eager in helping others

• Better outlook on life in general

• Improved sleep

• Improved relationships

Later studies have generally found similar results: Short expressions of gratitude on a regular basis have a positive impact on our mood and much more

So how can you bring more gratitude into your life?

Start simply

1. Every morning when you wake, give thanks for being blessed with another day, some people are denied the privilege.

2. Focus on your breath and say silently to yourself “I breathe in love, I breathe out gratitude”,. I like to send this out before me each morning. This is also a good way to introduce meditation into your daily routine.

3. I always give thanks for my food before I eat as I am so grateful to have food on my table each day.

4. Say “Thank You” to everyone that takes the time to connect with you whether on social media or in person.

5. When you are struggling with an issue, instead of letting it take over your day, switch the thought in your mind and ask yourself what are you grateful for in this moment and it will make the issue seem a little easier to deal with.

6. In those times of challenges or struggles, ask yourself what it is trying to teach you and be grateful for the awareness of knowing that every experience is an opportunity to learn and grow.

7. When we are grateful, we are more able to help others without wanting anything in return and know that we are helping to make a difference.

8. Every night as you go to bed, breathe deeply and list in your mind all that you are grateful for in that day, you will sleep easier and bring that positive energy into your tomorrows.

9. Keep a gratitude journal, I designed one that has daily guidance and affirmations which helps bring your focus back to the blessings in your life, it also allows you a space each day to write your own thoughts. People who use it say it has helped bring more awareness into their lives.

10. Smile because you are alive :-)

Be Thankful
Be thankful that you don’t already have everything you desire,
If you did, what would there be to look forward to?

Be thankful when you don’t know something
For it gives you the opportunity to learn.

Be thankful for the difficult times.
During those times you grow.

Be thankful for your limitations
Because they give you opportunities for improvement.

Be thankful for each new challenge
Because it will build your strength and character.

Be thankful for your mistakes
They will teach you valuable lessons.

Be thankful when you’re tired and weary
Because it means you’ve made a difference.

It is easy to be thankful for the good things.
A life of rich fulfilment comes to those who are
also thankful for the setbacks.

GRATITUDE can turn a negative into a positive.
Find a way to be thankful for your troubles
and they can become your blessings.
~ Author Unknown ~

I smile because I’m alive

Sharon Fitzmaurice is an Author, Holistic Wellness Coach and Speaker based in Co. Galway. Her main focus is to help others to help themselves in all areas of their lives. She provides regular meditation and mindfulness classes for the private and public sector. She is a Reiki Master Teacher and as well as seeing her clients each week, she provides training on how to incorporate the Reiki practise into other people’s lives. Her role as a Clinical Hypnotherapist has helped her work on a subconscious level with clients in getting to deep rooted issues and helping them awaken to their full potential. She is a regular speaker at events introducing the positive benefits of creating change that starts from within. Sharon has shared her story of overcoming childhood trauma, anxiety and depression in her best-selling book -Someone please help me, so I did

Do words really matter?

I received this beautiful email from a lady yesterday and it made me realise that in sharing my story, it is having an impact on other people's lives in a positive way. 

"I heard you speaking on Dublin City FM with Danielle a couple of weeks ago and your voice went straight into my heart. I can not tell you how your words inspired me with your calm strength in all that you have come through. I immediately went online and ordered your book, I couldn't wait to read your story and as I did, it opened up so much healing for me. I had felt lost and alone in my pain and hearing you that day made me feel like someone understood what I had been feeling for years. I devoured your book, I just could not leave it down. My heart felt at times as if it was going to burst with sadness and then with joy. I am finally starting to feel free. I have since booked an appointment to see a counsellor in my area, it's time to let go of the past, I have lived there long enough. I am now excited for my future. I want to join you on your Camino walks next year as I have not only kept my pain hidden, but also the real me. I was afraid of not being good enough. I now know I am good enough. Thank you Sharon, you may never fully realise the impact your story has on others but I am letting you know that it has changed my life. I hope I get to meet you in person someday, maybe on the Camino trip or on one of your healing retreats, but know you are never far away from my thoughts and that they are full of gratitude now. Diane"

As I told Danielle Serpico of Mind Matters on Dublin City FM , I started writing my book as a way to release my own inner feelings and thoughts, to help me break free from being a prisoner of my own painful past. I never truly believed I would go on to publish my book, it is like it took on a life of its own and people really resonated with my experiences, or certain aspects of my past that had affected me on so many levels where I had at one point contemplated suicide.

Sharing my story was allowing my real self to be seen -flaws and all. It helped people to understand that we are not alone in our pain and struggles, that no matter what you go through, there is someone else that has shared a similar experience and have too wanted to create a change in their lives, but weren't sure what steps to take. For me the more I opened up and shared my truth with whomever wanted to listen or read my story, I found that my story became their story. It was now a gateway for some people to open the door of the past and start to acknowledge that they too were a prisoner of their past and it was time to step out into the open to reveal themselves.  This is not always that easy as there is a certain amount of shame and guilt associated with hiding our dirty secrets of the past and fear of being judged by others is the biggest thing holding us all back. 

I promise, like all of you, I too was so scared of revealing my true self and telling everyone what I had endured, not just by the choices other people made, but by the choices that I made at a time of now knowing or understanding anything different. It wasn't until I started to explore my inner self and become more aware of who I was at that time and who I truly wanted to be. I was learning who I wanted to become, it was like reinventing myself, from a person that had no self-belief or self-worth for most of her life, now she was going to step out into the unknown and take it one day at a time. It was the best step I have ever taken but I had to take it one step at a time!

I read books by Anita Moorjani, Dannion Brinkley, Wayne Dyer, Deepak Chopra and so many other wonderful teachers and authors that had inspired me to stop looking outside of myself for the solution and to start looking within, their words helped me to feel empowered and secure in the knowledge that maybe I could get through this stage of my life where I had only felt darkness and they helped me find my inner light. Their words helped me. I found tools and techniques that helped me heal and I learned and studied them without realising that I would go on to use them in my own wellness practise to help others to this day. 

For me, words have such power. We can use them in a positive way to help and inspire others. Since my book was published last December, I have given many interviews and written blogs and posts about how I felt many years ago and how I feel now.  I am not numb anymore, I can now really feel with a passion what I want to do with my life, who I want to help and how I can make even a little difference in the world. This is not just because I published a book, no, this is as a human being. We all have the power inside of us to share a positive word with our family, friends, colleague, or even a stranger. When we are online to support the people you are in contact with, give them a thumbs up, show them that their words matter. Human interaction has become something of a novelty in our society, let's try and bring it back into fashion and be more open and aware of each other. Take the time to really listen to each others words and share your stories. 

Sharon Fitzmaurice is a Holistic Wellness Coach & Author based in Co. Galway. She facilitates clients and groups in workshops, training and retreats to help promote self-awareness and personal development through mindfulness, meditation, clinical hypnotherapy, reiki, talk therapy, and also speaking at public events or seminars on helping you awaken your potential. 

Let's make it a January to remember...for all the right reasons

Yes it is a new year and you are probably bombarded with ‘New Year, new you’ advertising and may feel as if you have to change in some way!? Try adding something instead.

Do what feels right for you. You are fabulous just the way you are and if you are feeling not so fabulous at the moment, just ask yourself what one thing you can do differently to make things a little better in your life. So for many of us we want to be healthier, so what does that entail? If you are continuously focusing on what you DON’T want in your life, you will get more of the same. Try changing your mindset around what you DO want in your life. For example : I want to be healthier this week/month/year so I going to add more walking or exercise to my daily routines. I want to clear out my system as I feel bloated or sluggish, so I will add more fresh foods to my daily meals. I want to learn more not just to help me in my work life, but to develop personally, so I am looking at some courses for the year ahead. I love learning and it keeps the brain active. Plus it is great to set yourself a challenge just for the fun of it.

January is just another month, but for some people they have always told themselves the same story that they ‘hate’ this month and it is a real ‘downer’ after the Christmas, it’s not, it’s just what you tell yourself that amplifies that feeling. Just look at each day as a brand new day, what can you do in each day to make it a little better? I went walking this morning with a friend and even though it was raining before we started off, we didn’t use it as an excuse not to go. We fill our minds and then our lives with excuses, which in turn block us from moving forward. If you hear yourself making an excuse today, ask yourself why you are stopping yourself?

So I am giving you all a little challenge, I want you to find one new thing that you can do this week that will change the way you look at January. I am starting new classes and running workshops and retreats this month, so I have so much to look forward to, if you haven’t planned anything yet, maybe it is time to start looking at something that will give you a boost and time out for yourself. We have 24 hours in the day, use one of them for You! Don’t keep putting off living your life. It’s not about failing or succeeding, it is simply about trying. How would we ever know what anything is like if we never tried it?

Here are a few simple starting points, the more you achieve the simple steps in adding more positive change to your life, the easier it will be to take the next step in adding something a little more adventurous :-

Read a new book

Do 10 minutes stretching every morning

Eat more greens

Arrange to meet a friend for a chat

Arrange a date night with your other half

Go to the park with your kids

Bring your dog to the beach (I did that yesterday)

Empty out your wardrobe and recycle your clothes by giving to a charity shop

Join a new class and meet new people, this helps build your confidence and self-esteem

Plan ahead so you have something to work towards in your career, personal life and relationships

Go to bed a little earlier a few nights each week

Start meditating - it has been the greatest benefit to my life

Be gentle and more compassionate to yourself

Take it one step at a time

Whatever way you look at this month, try to remember that it is just another month. The choices you make today will reflect in your tomorrows.

Let me know what you are doing to add more to your life this month.

Have a wonderful January everyone.

Enjoy your journey

Love Sharon

Sharon Fitzmaurice is an Holistic Wellness Coach, Speaker and best selling Author based in Co. Galway. She works with clients through one to one Reiki & Hypnotherapy Sessions helping bring about positive change within their lives. She also teaches Reiki therapy so that others may use it for their own well-being and moving forward in their personal and professional lives. She regularly runs workshops on self-care, meditation, mindfulness along with weekend retreats to provide an environment to guide others on their journey of self-awareness and personal development. She has spoken at private and public events, sharing her story of overcoming adversity and helping others to awaken their potential.

Want to take the next step in your journey?

I told someone yesterday that I must be the most enthusiastic student as I love learning! It’s not to have a head full of knowledge, but learning to find new ways to help myself and others. When I learn something - I want to share it with everyone, that is what knowledge is for. So I am very grateful to be invited to speak at different events in the coming weeks and I hope one or more of them may interest you into looking at what we need to let go of in our lives so that we can create new opportunities to change and grow.

Nothing ever stays the same and neither should we. Take one step forward and you are halfway there.

Let’s enjoy the walk of life a little more each day

Join me for my upcoming events in Galway, Limerick and Clare

Wednesday 28th November at 7.30pm in 56 Central Galway - join me as I share with you how Change starts within as guest speaker for Positive Living Network

Thursday 29th November 5pm to 8pm- Bank Of Irleand, 19 Eyre Square Galway fundraising event for Galway Rape Crisis Centre - Theme is Resilience, I will be speaking and on the night you may sample taster therapies and other workshops

Sunday 2nd December - 1 Pery Square, Limerick, 10am to 1pm- Together our Stories - Renew her soul, I am delighted to be joining with three wonderful ladies and speaking at this event.

Meditation class Tuam - last one for 2018 Thursday 6th December at 7.30pm in Millers house, Chapel Lane.

Bookings now being taken for some of the upcoming 2019 events

Reiki - all levels in Tuam

Self-care workshop 26th January in Clayton Hotel, Galway

Weekend Retreat in Co. Clare - February 22nd to 24th

Are you self aware?

Thought of the day 💚
The key to self awareness is to be self aware. To recognise and understand our strengths, weaknesses, thoughts, beliefs and motivation as an individual. 

I have met so many people over the years personally and through my work, each one unique in their way of dealing with life's challenges. We all react or respond differently to our environment depending on our current state of emotional or mental awareness.

My greatest lesson on my own journey and in turn which has led me to work in the basics of people getting to know themselves has  brought about so many positive changes within my own life and in the lives of my clients. But it all started by getting to the root cause of their problems. By helping them understand what they are feeling and learning to recognise what triggers a certain response to certain situations, will help them to release the belief that they are 'just this way'. 

We can all change our perspective on our lives, it starts with a willingness to want something better in our lives, we all deserve to wake up each morning feeling good and to live the best life possible. 

We all have dreams and aspirations but if we do not fully understand ourselves and why we are the way we are, we will find it challenging to take that next step.

So stop being so hard on yourself. Take a moment today and write about your own thoughts and feelings. Are they based on the past or are they really what you want to feel today? What is it that is holding you back and what is it you would most like at this moment.

Always end your story with a positive, there are so many, but some times we need to recognise that our minds are clouded with our stories of the past and to be present we must be aware today.

Mindful living with Sharon
www.sharonfitzmauricemindfulness.com

Find your stride

Only last night as I was working with my Mindfulness group in Tuam, we explored the idea of taking things in our stride or finding our own pace, in a world where we are told to grow up, pass all your exams, be successful, get a job, buy a house, save your money, it is all like running a race where there is no finish line!

Where are we all running to ? As I said in my group last night, the end point for all of us is physical departure from this world,  and in that moment will you look back and think "yeah I really got through that life quickly!" Believe it or not, most people feel that they missed a lot of life by working so hard, spending too much time getting 'things' done and missing out on what is truly important. So what's the rush?

Society has taught us that we must be 'doing' something all of the time or we are just wasting time. I disagree, in the moments that I have spend meditating or walking, I don't consider it to be nothing, I actually believe it is the one of the most vital parts of my day. In that time, I allow myself to be mindful of my surroundings, to focus on how I feel and accept whatever arises for me in that moment.  I also get some of my most splendid ideas and inspirations by taking time out to ground and balance my energy - mind, body and soul. 

I have walked some of the Camino de Santiago and each time the experience is different. I love that feeling of not knowing what the day or route ahead will lay in store for me, I can't plan what the weather will be like and no matter hail, rain or shine, I will soak up (excuse the pun) the experience. I suppose in a way, doing the Camino has taught me that this is a challenge that I have chosen, words said by a beautiful lady with Multiple Sclerosis who joined us on last May's trip. That each day we are faced with many challenges and instead of worrying about not being able to face them, we simply ask ourselves, what can I do today to help myself get through this? We take it one step at a time, one day at a time. We can't figure out what to do about something that hasn't happened yet, we can only focus on what is happening right now. 

Yes of course you have to plan for the future, I wouldn't have any work or adventures if I didn't plan., but instead of over thinking and analysing all that you want to do with your life and career, start trusting yourself a little bit more. When we allow ourselves to be mindfully focused on the present and how we are feeling, we will form a better and deeper understanding of what feels right for us and work towards creating that dream or vision into becoming a reality in our lives. We start with one small step and build on it day by day. Nothing is ever an overnight success, people you see and admire have worked very hard, sometimes for many years to be where they are today and they continue to live their lives and build their dreams. They trust and believe in themselves. 

So a little reminder to us all today, life is not a race, we are all winners if we allow ourselves to go at our own pace and take things in our stride. Listen to your intuition,  do what creates the most joy in your life, be with the people that bring out the best in you., be your most fabulous unique self and walk tall. 

Happy days, Sharon

Holistic Wellness Coach & Author

Want to join me on the Camino next year? 

See all my upcoming events

Why we need support

It's always wonderful to see independent people making their way in life, love and business but we all need support along the way. 

 As an self-employed business woman, I found myself being able to work to my own schedule whilst being a Mom to two young children and working from home. It has loads of advantages in that I could drop and collect my kids from school, make my own hours and arrange clients visits during times that suited my family requirements. The disadvantages were that I felt isolated at times in having to be the marketing, sales and advertising, project administrator and financial person along with being a wellness coach to my clients, running groups, workshops and retreats in person, all this and trying to write my book. I still wonder how I managed it all!?

Today as I sit here and write this, I am still working from home, but have spread my wings and given myself space to ask for support in the things I am really not good at! I don't have to be superwoman!! Many of the things that I was unable to do, I just put aside and told myself I didn't need them for my business, but now I realise that if we don't keep up with technology and keep learning, we will be left behind and our business won't grow and develop. 

I had heard of Samantha Kelly and Women's Inspire Network on social media and followed with great interest at the content of their posts and tweets. It wasn't until Samantha connected me to a fellow Coach and Author Hilary Connor that I realised that I needed that connection with other like minded women in business who were all there to support and help each other to grow and learn from one another. I have since connected with so many wonderful ladies in our galway meet up which was started by Asumpta Gallagher and reconnected with some old friends too. Only this morning I had a message from  Sharon Thompson asking me to do a crowdcast with her, I smiled as I replied immediately saying "Yes", knowing that this was a learning opportunity for me as I replied with "you will have to show me how to do that". Everything new can be daunting at times, but it is also very exciting to know that there are so many wonderful people in this group that are willing to share their expertise and skills with us.

The more we connect and share with each other, the more we will grow and develop ourselves and our businesses. I always believe that no matter what we learn, it is not just so that we 'know stuff' but that we are able to pass it on to another. 

This is the start of my journey with WIN and I am so happy to see where it will take me as so far it has been amazing.

Sharon Fitzmaurice

Holistic Wellness Coach & Author

www.sharonfitzmauriceindfulness.com 

Be real and true to yourself

Being real starts with you. 

No make up, no hair done and even a little zit on my chin!

I wanted my first blog of 2018 to be real. Like many of you, I too am guilty of showing the best side of myself on social media and in truth none of us look that good all the time, we all have to put in a little effort now and again. So today I have taken a photo of myself straight out of the shower showing the 'real' me without make up, hair done or dressed up to the nines. I didn't even smile for this photo!

In my book Someone please help me, so I did I wrote from my worst time in where I felt I needed everyone else's approval before I could accept  myself, that is because I did not believe in myself. I had no real self-worth, how did I find it? Well it doesn't come from taking fabulous photos of yourself and looking good, that is just for appearance sake, I needed to look within and see the beauty that lay within me and start to let it shine through every pore of my being. 

No matter what anyone looks like on the outside, there is always an internal struggle in some form. The greatest philosophers in the world have written about this through the ages, the acceptance of self is our greatest challenge but also our greatest opportunity for learning who we are and who we want to be.

We are now dominated by social media images and positive quotes that tell you to be happy and smiling all the time, that is not real. We don't wake up happy, we have to choose to be that way. Happiness stems from the thoughts and feelings in each moment, the appreciation of what is without judgement. This also includes the feelings of anger and sadness, accepting them and allowing yourself to feel these emotions as they arise. But would you take a photo of yourself when you are crying your eyes out or screaming your head off and post on social media!? NO, you certainly would not, care would anyone see the 'real' you!/. 

I smile as I type this as I have often cried and looked at myself in the mirror, not a pretty sight let me tell you, but it is the realest me I will ever see, it is the me that is vulnerable, expressive and allowing myself to be who I am in that moment. None of us are ever going to be perfect as there is no such thing. None of us are going to be happy and positive all the time, or if you pretend to be, you are not being real with yourself or the world. 

When I wake up each morning, I will take 5 minutes looking in the mirror and just breathe deeply whilst focusing not on the 'image' of myself but on the core of who I am.

If you can look into your own eyes, even the sleepy ones, and tell yourself you are loved and accepted, you are off to a great start everyday. Don't get caught up in the lives of other people, that is their life. They may inspire you, but allow your dreams and passion to explode into the world in the only way you can, your way. 

Being true to yourself never goes out of style. 

It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are ~. e.e. cummings

Happy New Year

Love Sharon

Deepening your connection to Self & Spirit

Last weekend I had the privilege of taking my 15th group away on a weekend retreat to the beautiful Boghill Centre in Kilfenora in Co. Clare. Returning to the centre is like coming home for me, it is a place of warmth, comfort, peace and we are always welcomed with a warm embrace and nurtured by the surroundings and fabulous food all weekend. 

Our beautiful workshop space nestled in the trees 

The theme for the retreat was deepening your connection to self and spirit, a theme that I was inspired to create seeing the amount of people who attend my client clinics or meditation groups and workshops who seem to have lost a sense of connection not only to themselves, but also to their surroundings and that includes the people they share it with. This also includes myself. We believe we are deeply connected as we move through life as such a fast pace, but it is only when we stop and listen, do we realise how far removed we are from truly understanding all that we are thinking and feeling. When you become more self-aware, you start to realise that you are not truly connected at all. We may have lost our sense of purpose, unable to feel a passion for what we are doing and life just seems to carry us along with no feeling of us being the creators of our destinies. 

 I feel that we are being guided more and more to reconnecting to our true selves, who we are now and learning to accept the present moment without judgement and learning to change the things we do not like one step at a time. But first we must sit and listen to our inner voice and what it is trying to tell us. This weekend allowed space and time for myself and the group to do just that, through meditation, mindful practices and also support work in the group. 

When we allow ourselves to be immersed in the richness of the energy of any group, we start to open up and resonate with what others are feeling, it brings out so many feelings that when in a safe environment, that vulnerability is a strength in connection between our hearts and minds. Together we find solace in knowing that we are not alone in our fears and worries, our past traumas are familiar to others too, there is no shame in speaking your truth. In fact once you open up to your own truth, there is a freedom in energy that is palpable, others respond to you and a healing takes place that there are no words for, it is felt and seen by each person on a deeper level than ever before. Tears fall slowly down the cheeks, your breathing changes and you feel within the pit of your stomach a stirring that is rising to the surface, you are finally allowing yourself to break free from the restraints you had bound yourself to for far too long. It may have felt like you were keeping yourself safe and protecting yourself from what you most feared, but in fact you were only keeping it locked inside to grow bigger and stronger, believing that if you didn't look at it, feel it or understand it, it would just disappear. Only when we face our biggest fear, learn to befriend it and learn from it will be free of it. This is our truth, to reveal ourselves flaws and all, this is where our power lies in creating change within ourselves and others. When we truly connect to life, we connect to the wholeness of our spirit. 

Butterfly is my symbol for transformation

This is when the true transformation takes place. You may think that one weekend couldn't possible help anyone with a life filled with pain and hurt but I have seen the biggest changes to people's mindsets within one single session of deep connection to self. Sometimes we are unaware of what the root cause of our issues may be and with support, you can get to the bottom of anything, but it has to be a choice made by the individual in that they want to create a change in their own life as they know there is so much else they have to offer the world.  They want to be part of it, to live it and to feel that they are too valued and accepted for who they are. We all deserve this but first you must commit to giving yourself the space and time to do so. It is not just for people that consider themselves spiritual, it is for everyone, a longing within your heart that calls out from the depths of your soul that you are more than your pain and sorrows that are buried deep within the caverns of your heart. It is a heavy weight to carry all by yourself, so in sharing and supporting each other through the process, we find ways to understand and accept how it all feels right now, we are not our past, we don't live there anymore, we can't change anything, only how we respond to our memories of it now. We transform how we react to the thoughts and beliefs that we once believed as our truth,  we start to remember that we are more than our past and we can become whomever we choose to be, but that starts with the acceptance of who we are now. In time we will be able to come out of our past cocoons and start to gently spread our wings, to be seen for who we truly are and take flight beyond where we once believed we could never go, past our own limitations.

To me, connecting to self and others in the vital ingredient to our well being. This weekend like many of my weekends, I have seen people transform in front of my eyes, I have seen them grow into their own hearts and allow themselves to be filled with hope and joy, to believe that they are stronger than they believed and that no matter what challenges they face in life, they now realise they have the inner strength and courage to face it. Retreats are not just to get away from reality, but to understand what your reality is and find ways in which you learn to cope with the many daily struggles we all face. In doing so, you allow yourself time to reconnect to that deeper part of you that wants to break out into the world and be seen. 

I am deeply grateful for my journey and in sharing it with others, I have learned that I am growing stronger each and every day, in turn I am helping others to find their strength which allows us all to shine our light in this world. If you only do one thing for yourself each day, let it be the most important thing in taking time to connect to you, you are so worth it. Keep things simple and find peace even in the midst of chaos, smile and know that this too will pass. 

With love & blessings to you all

Sharon 

My next weekend retreat dates are in 2018 all to be held in the Boghill centre

February 23rd to 25th 

June 15th to 17th 

September 28th to 30th 

Love letters from your Soul

Do you remember as a child laying down upon the grass and looking up at the sky? In your mind  you just allowed images to float into your mind as you smiled at the many creations you could make out of a white fluffy shape far off in the distance. The many dreams you woke from seeing yourself taking part in the greatest of adventures and travelling foreign lands meeting people from different cultures as you were the greatest explorer?

You may think these were the whimsical ramblings of your childhood, but from these early years, you were forming a belief in your mind that everything was possible and that some day you would grow up and achieve all those  magnificent dreams. So what changed?

Some may say 'life' happened and that your circumstances along the way altered your dreams and stopped you in your tracks, then there are others that say "I am living my dreams", what makes us so different?

Most of us take on life with many dreams and ambitions but may have got caught up with other responsibilities along the way and now feel that we are no longer the great adventurer, but a great provider or protector.

But do you know who you are right now, have you taken the time to ask yourself one simple question, who am I, what do I want?

I know on the days that I get a little overwhelmed by 'all I have to do' that I get lost in that monkey chatter in my head and lose sight of what is really important. When we allow ourselves to lose sight of our true passion we start to resent the things we 'have' to do as we are not putting any real focus on what we 'want' to do.

So my little exercise for mind, body and soul every day is to simply sit for a few minutes and take out a pen and paper and write one question that I need to ask myself for the answer, believe me no one else can give you the answer you really seek, only you!

You may not get the answer you wanted, but then again we more than likely never do, but our soul knows exactly what is right for us and will guide that idea or inspiration into our hearts and minds, if we allow it.

Throughout the day, be mindful of the question you asked earlier on and had written down and simply go about your day, you will start to become aware of the thoughts and feelings that come into your conscious mind as you have opened up a doorway to receive guidance, write down any thoughts or ideas and let them flow. You will be absolutely amazed and all the things you have written by the end of the day. 

Then when you have loads of ideas, look at each one and decide to put one or all of them into action, it just takes a decision in your  mind, the intention to create or make it happen and you are already half way there. 

The problem is most of you will have loads of ideas and just allow them to flow out into the Ether, wondering why nothing is changing in your life. I know, I have been there! 

Everyday set aside five minutes, take out a pen and paper. Write a question you would like an answer to and start to write every idea or thought that you feel relates to it. You can still create the life you want each and every day, it doesn't have to happen immediately, but by taking your power back and allowing yourself to dream mindfully can be a wonderful experience in you opening your world up to new and exciting opportunities.

Let me know how you get on, I would love to hear all your amazing ideas 

Love Sharon 

Reflecting on change - Retreat

This past weekend I spent another wonderful retreat weekend with people from all over Ireland and the Uk,  in The Boghill Centre  . Every time I arrive to the centre in the beautiful rural setting of Kilfenora, Co. Clare, I am embraced by the peace and welcoming natural beauty of its surroundings. This is my home away from home for two weekends every year and I get to share it with the most amazing people each time. 

The theme of the retreat this month was Transforming with Spirit, it is not about changing who you are, but gently and compassionately acknowledging, accepting and loving yourself for who you are right now. It is changing the way you see yourself and how you feel about you from this moment on. It was a deeply emotional and life changing weekend for many of us including me. 

Many of the retreat participants were new to our little weekend getaway, but there were many familiar faces that have returned for the 4th and 5th time to further acknowledge where they are on their journey in life and to reconnect with themselves and a beautiful network of unconditional support and love from the group and from their new friends. It is amazing to see the bonds that are made on a soul level between people on the retreat, it is like we are stripped back of all ego, masks and pretense. We open our hearts to each other to reveal a beautiful but sometimes vulnerable side to ourselves that we are unable to do until now.

On this retreat I was joined by fellow Spiritual Medium Teachers Bronia West  & Wayne McHugh who shared so much of their beautiful energy with us all in imparting their learned skills from years of experience in helping others to connect on a deeper level to themselves and to Spirit. It was a such a joy to work in the energy of these two amazing people. In the evening we invited Bev Shiplee up to join them for an evening of Mediumship, beautiful messages of love, forgiveness and support were channelled from Spirit to the groups. There were even a few surprise guests invited to debut their abilities. Amazing to watch the courage shining through when we just allow ourselves to stand in our power. 

This was my 13th group to bring on retreat and each time is completely different. I know I am guided in my work and no matter what the plan in my head is, I have to just go with my heart. The flow of the retreat is all depending on the energy of the group and I always go with that. I know that with each exercise we partake in we are deepening our love and understanding to ourselves and the world. I truly believe that there are miracles occurring right in front of us everyday and sometimes we just need to stop and accept them, but first we must accept ourselves.

I felt deeply grateful to lead this retreat with so many amazing and talented people all waiting to shine their light even brighter. I was honoured on the Sunday closing ceremony by each person with a thank you from their heart and a special message from each, I felt it very deeply and it moved my soul into a new state of gratitude for life and for learning. 

We are all learning and growing, no matter who we are, where we are in our journey, we have so much more to experience. And whilst doing so you can have loads of fun along the way, well in our retreats we certainly know how to throw an after party.

Love to all. 

Our September retreat is nearly fully booked, so I may have a surprise retreat in May 26th to 28th, please let me know if you are interested. 

Looking for Love?

I am sure like most people in the world, you too have loved someone but didn't receive the same love back. Why?

Sometimes the  love we seek from another is only to fill the gap within ourselves. We have all fallen head over heels in love or so we thought at the time, with someone that was truly not good for us. Agree?

We can not make anyone love us! Yes you are adorable, cute and funny, but that does not mean that everyone you are attracted to is going to feel the same way about you. We sometimes feel a connection with a certain person, but it may not mean that you are going to live happily ever after, no if might just simply be that you have connected with someone who is showing you at this moment in time, what you are really lacking in your own life and are looking for someone else to fill that need.

I hear you laughing, yes some of you just would like to have more sex! And more of you want a long lasting committed relationship, but are you going to sacrifice your soul to be with someone that truly does not love and respect you the way you deserve? NO of course you are not.

So how do we help ourselves? Well firstly, when we are lacking in love, it does not mean that another person will make you feel whole. We may believe it in our minds, but truly our heart is looking to feel self-love and self-belief in ourselves.  Start by looking at what you really want (apart from the sex and someone to be by your side until eternity) in your life.

Are you meeting all the same kind of people and none of them are really what you are looking for, but because you don't feel like you have a choice, you keep reverting back to your ex or to the person that messages you at the end of the night? Don't feel bad, lots of people do it too. But think about the kind of person you really want in your life. Think of the attributes of this person, how you would like to feel when you are with them or even not with them. Allow yourself to feel safe, respected, loved, cherished and also to grow as an individual, just because you are with someone, does not mean you need to spend your time with them or thinking of them 24 hours of the day. If we continue to go back and do the same things over and over again, nothing will ever change. 

True love is a mutual respect of two people who allow each other to be themselves whole heartedly. Yes there is compromise when we commit to each other in any relationship, but it is a deep mutual respect for our dreams, lives and passions. If we allow ourselves to be more open about the people we want in our lives, friends or lovers, we start to open our hearts to the people that are attracted to that positive energy.

If you only believe that you will get the people who hurt or reject you, then that is all you will get. You are worth so much more than that, but you must first believe in yourself.

Start each day with a positive mindset, forget about the people that have hurt you in the past and let it go. You are not your past and there is no pattern to your relationships, you can change right now.  Your ex is an ex for a reason! We learn from the people we have shared our past with and we accept responsibility for our own actions. We acknowledge that that person came into our lives for a reason and we allowed them to treat us a certain way, but we have moved on from there and are now facing each day with a new positive attitude.

So go out and be yourself, the next time you meet someone and feel a connection, it may not be the love affair of the century, but at least you are meeting people and sharing your amazing self with them, how far you want to share is up to you :-) 

Have fun :-)

BTW I have found LOVE! How did I know it was real love? I didn't, I just knew how I felt and how I was being treated. When someone loves you enough to believe in you more that you believe in yourself, they want the best for you. They will encourage you to be your best self. Of course we have arguments and sometimes he drives me crazy, but most of the time, I have a big smile on my face. He sees me for who I really am and that is okay, sometimes I can't really see myself, so it is lovely to have someone who reminds me that I am special.

Love Sharon 

You are all THAT!

Do you spend most of your time telling yourself all that you are not?

Believe it or not the average person has 70,000 thoughts a minute and most of them are negative or they are unaware of what they are actually thinking about.

So how can we help to change this pattern?

By changing our pattern of thoughts and self-talk, we can become more aware of what we want to be and start to programme our subconscious mind with the belief that we are everything we want to be.. The subconscious mind does not know the difference between reality and illusion, so whatever you feed it, it takes as fact! 

Some people are great at visualising themselves leading the life of their dreams and others need a little bit more work at it, so to help you get started, here is a little mantra to help you on your way to being all that.

I AM THAT, I AM

I Am that I Am is the common English translation of the response God used in the Bible when Moses asked for his name.

Transforming Negatives - When we put negatives after I AM as 'I am broke', 'I am not worthy', 'I am a failure', it creates limitations. Instead you could affirm 'I AM powerful', 'I am abundant' and you will automatically be filled with enormous capacity for transformation

 So take out a pen and paper and write I AM THAT, I AM at the top

What do you want THAT to mean for you? Under the word THAT, write down all the things you want it to hold for you, so that everytime you say I AM THAT I AM, you are empowering yourself with all the qualities and positive attributes THAT holds for you.

What is it you most want to be in your life?

For example THAT could be 'happy, confident, positive, abundant, living my dreams, working in my ideal job, in the most loving relationship, respected by my peers, open to new opportunities and the list goes on and on. Do you get the idea?

So once you have written down everything and I mean everything that you want to be held in the energy of THAT,  every time you say the mantra I AM THAT I AM, you are embedding the thoughts and energy of the belief that you are already all that.

So get writing and you can add to it as often as you like as long as you remember to focus your intention on all being held in THAT as you repeat your mantra I AM THAT, I AM

Love Sharon