Here Are the Best Ways to Improve Your Sleep and Boost Your Mental Health →

You know sleep is crucial for your well-being. But did you know that it can affect your mental health, too? Getting enough sleep can impact all areas of your life. Catching up on your rest is a step in the right direction no matter what other stresses life gives you.

Here are the best ways to improve your sleep so that you can boost your mental health, courtesy of therapist and author Sharon Fitzmaurice.

Set a Bedtime for Yourself

Most adults think about bedtimes as sleep rules for children. But Science Daily confirms that bedtimes are also beneficial for grownups. The less consistent your sleep habits, the higher your health risks—increasing your chances of high blood sugar, heart attack, stroke, and other health issues. Irregular sleep is the problem—even if you get adequate hours each night.

Experts recommend setting a schedule and sticking with it—even variations of 10 minutes in sleep and wake times seemed to affect people’s health in relevant studies. You should also skip sleeping in on weekends. What are the benefits, apart from your metabolic and other physical health? Research showed that people with irregular sleep schedules were more likely to feel depressed or under a lot of stress. In short, consistent bedtimes make for better mental health outcomes.

Change Your Sleep Environment

Your bedroom should be an oasis for relaxation. Fortunately, incorporating positivity and relaxing elements into your room is easy. Do some decluttering and be sure to avoid interacting with anything potentially negative, like your work or social media, in the bedroom. Also, think about simple tricks like making your room darker or adding some background noise to keep you relaxed.

It’s important to understand that light cues your body that it’s time to wake up, making light-blocking curtains an excellent investment. Per the Cleveland Clinic, pink noise “enhances brain activity that’s associated with… deep sleep.” In short, relaxing music might help you sleep better, even if a fan or static sounds keep you awake.

Other small changes to your sleep environment, such as adjusting the room’s ambient temperature, can also help you catch higher-quality Z’s. The recommended sleep temperature is between 16-18°C (60-65°F). Higher or lower temperature settings can cause you to sleep restlessly. Instead, aim for a cave-like feeling in your room—colder temps included.

You should also monitor your bedroom’s humidity levels because high humidity can bring an increase in mold and dust mites which may make sleeping more difficult. If your bedroom’s humidity level routinely rises over 50 percent, you can use a dehumidifier to lower the amount of moisture.

Avoid Too Much Tech

Although using your smartphone for pink or white noise while you sleep offers benefits, technology also threatens both natural circadian rhythms and overall mental health. Artificial light from smartphones, tablets, and TVs can mess up your body’s melatonin production (the stuff that makes you sleepy). It can also distract you from a proper bedtime.

To preserve your sleep quality, aim to cut technology out of your bedtime routine as much as possible. Put your devices away at least two hours before you plan to go to sleep for the best results. Of course, setting your music or white noise app requires smartphone usage. Keep it minimal and opt for an e-reader sans blue light or an old-fashioned paperback book for pre-sleep entertainment instead.

Take Advantage of Daylight

Those “wake signals” that natural light provides might be a problem when you’re trying to sleep. But during the day, you should take advantage of the sun’s rays. It seems exposure to sunlight can boost your serotonin levels—the hormone that helps you feel happier. People who spend more time in the sun have lower risks of depression and seasonal affective disorder (SAD), too.

Of course, getting outside also helps you burn energy—preparing you for a deeper and more refreshing night’s sleep. Whenever possible, enjoy sunlight—safely—in nature for even more mental health benefits. A scientific report from Nature.com confirms that spending time in nature correlates with better mental health and well-being. Around 120 minutes in nature each week is ideal—and even more beneficial with sunlight.

Improving your sleep helps restore the brain’s ability to process events and emotions, effectively “cleaning” it so you’re fresh for the next day. In this way, you can help restore a bit of peace in a stressful life—enhancing your mental health in the process.

Looking for more information on how to improve your quality of life? Connect with therapist and author Sharon Fitzmaurice.

Photo via Pixabay

 

What is your inner voice saying to you?

That little voice that gently urges you on and encourages you to keep going can sometimes come from the strangest of places!

 I started a walking challenge at the start of this second lockdown to help raise money for Galway Mountain Rescue Team, I love walking and being outdoors, so this would combine doing something for myself and helping others at the same time. I had virtually teamed up with some other participants from across the country, so we were there to support each other every day and we would get to see through our photos, the many places we each walked and a bit more of our beautiful countryside.

 I am not one to track my steps normally, but because of it being a challenge, I decided to use an app on my phone to record my walks. On my first day of walking, pressing the start button, it asked me to enter my distance target to be achieved that day which was 5KM, I suddenly felt a touch of anxiety about not being able to reach the daily targets and everyone would know about it! That little voice in my head that tries to halt my good intentions was fully in my awareness.

 We all have this voice when it comes to trying something new or challenging and it can stop us from experiencing new opportunities or reaching our goals. One of the first steps to eliminating self-judgement, is to recognise that the voice in your head never means you any harm. It may be the source of self-criticism, but that was never its intent. Believe it or not, it originally developed to help us feel emotionally safe and happy. It is trying to protect us. My inner voice was trying to stop me before I even got started - just in case I failed!

 It started to develop in me from a young age, believing that I was worthless and would amount to nothing. I was a people pleaser and constantly sought approval from others to validate myself as a good person. Worrying what other people thought of me was a clue to my past patterns and the nagging voice that told me “don’t try it, you will fail, and everyone will know you are worthless”

I took a deep breath and told myself “Just take it one step at a time” this is a mantra that has been part of my life since I started practising mindfulness over 25 years ago to help me deal with severe anxiety and depression. I had learned to trust my intuitive voice, the voice that urges me to take a chance, put myself out there, to go for what I wanted to achieve, this is the voice I trust and believe, but sometimes the other little voice sneaks in and makes us aware of the little doubts we may have about ourselves.

 I took off smiling and reminded myself to be mindful whilst walking and take in the beauty of my surroundings. It was a beautiful fresh day, and the sun was shining. I got into a good stride and felt energised, then suddenly out of nowhere, I heard a voice saying “1km – well done only 4 kms to go”. I didn’t realise the app would speak to me, at first I was like “this will drive me cracked if She keeps telling me how far I have gone/to go”, but when she announced to me I was 2KM into my distance target, I shouted out loud “YES”!!!!!

 Suddenly I was getting excited about reaching the next kilometre, what time I did it in and how many kilocalories I had burned off, it was like a whole new world for me, strange as that may seem to those that have been tracking or monitoring their every step for years, I had just enjoyed the pleasure of walking.

 By the time I had reached home again, I reached my target distance and had gone an extra 1.74km as it was a loop walk that I had done for many years, but never realised the distance.

I shared my photos I had taken along the way and the image of my recorded steps and KMs done for that day with the other participants and they with me, we all congratulated each other on a great day of walking and got to enjoy the sights they enjoyed along their routes.

 As I reflected on this later in the day, I realised that the voice coming from the app was like the positive side of my inner voice, the voice that says “yes you can do this, go for it” and I felt very grateful for having it and used it every day of the challenge, I used to say out loud to her…”thank you for encouraging me”

I know, I was really speaking to myself!

 We tend to knock ourselves down when we do not achieve the big things in life, but for me it was the achievement of the small things that led to me believing I could achieve the bigger things..

 If the voice in your head frequently tells you “you can’t do this”, try and come up with a visual image of yourself doing the challenge or reaching your goal. As you start to see yourself doing it, you will also start to realise the feelings associated with focusing your attention on something that feels great!

 Not only had I the voice in the app encouraging me, but I also had my virtual team to encourage me to keep going every day. Surround yourself with people who want you to achieve and their voices will also become part of your inner dialogue.

 Learn to me more aware of the inner voice, accept that it is there and have some compassion for all that it believes to be true for you in the past, in doing so you will give yourself the personal freedom to explore new aspects of yourself and the world. Listen to the voice that flows from your heart, it will always guide you in the right direction.

 “Every time you are tempted to react the same old way, ask yourself if you want to remain a prisoner of the past or a pioneer of the future” ~ Marcandangel

 

Sharon Fitzmaurice

Holistic Wellness Coach, Author & Podcaster

www.sharonfitzmauricemindfulness.com

 

 

 

 

 

Where is your happy place?

Along the winding paths of a country lane, the dawn just beginning to break, the birds starting their morning chorus, the world wakes up around me and I am present - not just in the world but in my body, my mind and my soul.

For each of us we may have a place that brings a sense of joy, peace or inner happiness, but it’s not just about the place, it’s about you. Allowing yourself space to be, to breathe deeply and to be truly yourself, this is your happy place.

So many people are searching for happiness that is portrayed by others on social media, remember most of us only post our happy days, there are few and far between that show you the other side of their lives, the days when they feel stressed, sad or lonely. We are only getting snippets of the lives of others and life can’t be defined by those images.

I love to see how other people are spending their days, but never compare my life to theirs personally or professionally, we are not living their lives and they are not living ours. As individuals we admire others when they do something that we would love to do and instead of feeling left behind, ask yourself “what is stopping me from doing this too?” When you see what others are doing, see it as inspiration to do something similar but in your own way. I for one get loads of ideas on places to visit from other people’s stories. I love finding a new adventure!

As the New Year approaches, I don’t set myself any unrealistic goals. To be alive and appreciate each day is the greatest goal we can have. As we do this, we start to feel more self-aware and in turn we progress onto doing what helps us feel good about ourselves. If we continue to dwell on what went wrong in the passing year, we get stuck in the negative attachments of the past. Let’s try and move on one step at a time.

It’s not about being better than you were last year, but simply allowing yourself to feel better in all that you do.

Ask yourself three simple questions

  • What activities do I most enjoy doing and how can I plan to do more of them in 2020?

  • If I had one dream that I could achieve in the coming year, what would it be?

  • What’s stopping me?

    By answering these questions it will help you identify where you can adjust your thoughts and focus on planning to bring about more of the positive aspects of what you want and love doing. This is the starting point

  • Identify

  • Focus

  • Plan

    There is no new you, only the you that wants to try something new. You are an accumulation of your thoughts, emotions and beliefs, when we understand this, we learn that every thought and feeling has an impact on our behaviours. Happiness is an inside job, I could be in the middle of a bog covered in muck and feel so much joy, not because of where I am, but for allowing myself time and space to be just me.

    Wherever you are, be present!

    Sharon Fitzmaurice

Do words really matter?

I received this beautiful email from a lady yesterday and it made me realise that in sharing my story, it is having an impact on other people's lives in a positive way. 

"I heard you speaking on Dublin City FM with Danielle a couple of weeks ago and your voice went straight into my heart. I can not tell you how your words inspired me with your calm strength in all that you have come through. I immediately went online and ordered your book, I couldn't wait to read your story and as I did, it opened up so much healing for me. I had felt lost and alone in my pain and hearing you that day made me feel like someone understood what I had been feeling for years. I devoured your book, I just could not leave it down. My heart felt at times as if it was going to burst with sadness and then with joy. I am finally starting to feel free. I have since booked an appointment to see a counsellor in my area, it's time to let go of the past, I have lived there long enough. I am now excited for my future. I want to join you on your Camino walks next year as I have not only kept my pain hidden, but also the real me. I was afraid of not being good enough. I now know I am good enough. Thank you Sharon, you may never fully realise the impact your story has on others but I am letting you know that it has changed my life. I hope I get to meet you in person someday, maybe on the Camino trip or on one of your healing retreats, but know you are never far away from my thoughts and that they are full of gratitude now. Diane"

As I told Danielle Serpico of Mind Matters on Dublin City FM , I started writing my book as a way to release my own inner feelings and thoughts, to help me break free from being a prisoner of my own painful past. I never truly believed I would go on to publish my book, it is like it took on a life of its own and people really resonated with my experiences, or certain aspects of my past that had affected me on so many levels where I had at one point contemplated suicide.

Sharing my story was allowing my real self to be seen -flaws and all. It helped people to understand that we are not alone in our pain and struggles, that no matter what you go through, there is someone else that has shared a similar experience and have too wanted to create a change in their lives, but weren't sure what steps to take. For me the more I opened up and shared my truth with whomever wanted to listen or read my story, I found that my story became their story. It was now a gateway for some people to open the door of the past and start to acknowledge that they too were a prisoner of their past and it was time to step out into the open to reveal themselves.  This is not always that easy as there is a certain amount of shame and guilt associated with hiding our dirty secrets of the past and fear of being judged by others is the biggest thing holding us all back. 

I promise, like all of you, I too was so scared of revealing my true self and telling everyone what I had endured, not just by the choices other people made, but by the choices that I made at a time of now knowing or understanding anything different. It wasn't until I started to explore my inner self and become more aware of who I was at that time and who I truly wanted to be. I was learning who I wanted to become, it was like reinventing myself, from a person that had no self-belief or self-worth for most of her life, now she was going to step out into the unknown and take it one day at a time. It was the best step I have ever taken but I had to take it one step at a time!

I read books by Anita Moorjani, Dannion Brinkley, Wayne Dyer, Deepak Chopra and so many other wonderful teachers and authors that had inspired me to stop looking outside of myself for the solution and to start looking within, their words helped me to feel empowered and secure in the knowledge that maybe I could get through this stage of my life where I had only felt darkness and they helped me find my inner light. Their words helped me. I found tools and techniques that helped me heal and I learned and studied them without realising that I would go on to use them in my own wellness practise to help others to this day. 

For me, words have such power. We can use them in a positive way to help and inspire others. Since my book was published last December, I have given many interviews and written blogs and posts about how I felt many years ago and how I feel now.  I am not numb anymore, I can now really feel with a passion what I want to do with my life, who I want to help and how I can make even a little difference in the world. This is not just because I published a book, no, this is as a human being. We all have the power inside of us to share a positive word with our family, friends, colleague, or even a stranger. When we are online to support the people you are in contact with, give them a thumbs up, show them that their words matter. Human interaction has become something of a novelty in our society, let's try and bring it back into fashion and be more open and aware of each other. Take the time to really listen to each others words and share your stories. 

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Sharon Fitzmaurice is a Holistic Wellness Coach & Author based in Co. Galway. She facilitates clients and groups in workshops, training and retreats to help promote self-awareness and personal development through mindfulness, meditation, clinical hypnotherapy, reiki, talk therapy, and also speaking at public events or seminars on helping you awaken your potential. 

Let's make it a January to remember...for all the right reasons

Yes it is a new year and you are probably bombarded with ‘New Year, new you’ advertising and may feel as if you have to change in some way!? Try adding something instead.

Do what feels right for you. You are fabulous just the way you are and if you are feeling not so fabulous at the moment, just ask yourself what one thing you can do differently to make things a little better in your life. So for many of us we want to be healthier, so what does that entail? If you are continuously focusing on what you DON’T want in your life, you will get more of the same. Try changing your mindset around what you DO want in your life. For example : I want to be healthier this week/month/year so I going to add more walking or exercise to my daily routines. I want to clear out my system as I feel bloated or sluggish, so I will add more fresh foods to my daily meals. I want to learn more not just to help me in my work life, but to develop personally, so I am looking at some courses for the year ahead. I love learning and it keeps the brain active. Plus it is great to set yourself a challenge just for the fun of it.

January is just another month, but for some people they have always told themselves the same story that they ‘hate’ this month and it is a real ‘downer’ after the Christmas, it’s not, it’s just what you tell yourself that amplifies that feeling. Just look at each day as a brand new day, what can you do in each day to make it a little better? I went walking this morning with a friend and even though it was raining before we started off, we didn’t use it as an excuse not to go. We fill our minds and then our lives with excuses, which in turn block us from moving forward. If you hear yourself making an excuse today, ask yourself why you are stopping yourself?

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So I am giving you all a little challenge, I want you to find one new thing that you can do this week that will change the way you look at January. I am starting new classes and running workshops and retreats this month, so I have so much to look forward to, if you haven’t planned anything yet, maybe it is time to start looking at something that will give you a boost and time out for yourself. We have 24 hours in the day, use one of them for You! Don’t keep putting off living your life. It’s not about failing or succeeding, it is simply about trying. How would we ever know what anything is like if we never tried it?

Here are a few simple starting points, the more you achieve the simple steps in adding more positive change to your life, the easier it will be to take the next step in adding something a little more adventurous :-

Read a new book

Do 10 minutes stretching every morning

Eat more greens

Arrange to meet a friend for a chat

Arrange a date night with your other half

Go to the park with your kids

Bring your dog to the beach (I did that yesterday)

Empty out your wardrobe and recycle your clothes by giving to a charity shop

Join a new class and meet new people, this helps build your confidence and self-esteem

Plan ahead so you have something to work towards in your career, personal life and relationships

Go to bed a little earlier a few nights each week

Start meditating - it has been the greatest benefit to my life

Be gentle and more compassionate to yourself

Take it one step at a time

Whatever way you look at this month, try to remember that it is just another month. The choices you make today will reflect in your tomorrows.

Let me know what you are doing to add more to your life this month.

Have a wonderful January everyone.

Enjoy your journey

Love Sharon


Sharon Fitzmaurice is an Holistic Wellness Coach, Speaker and best selling Author based in Co. Galway. She works with clients through one to one Reiki & Hypnotherapy Sessions helping bring about positive change within their lives. She also teaches Reiki therapy so that others may use it for their own well-being and moving forward in their personal and professional lives. She regularly runs workshops on self-care, meditation, mindfulness along with weekend retreats to provide an environment to guide others on their journey of self-awareness and personal development. She has spoken at private and public events, sharing her story of overcoming adversity and helping others to awaken their potential.

Be real and true to yourself

Being real starts with you. 

No make up, no hair done and even a little zit on my chin!

No make up, no hair done and even a little zit on my chin!

I wanted my first blog of 2018 to be real. Like many of you, I too am guilty of showing the best side of myself on social media and in truth none of us look that good all the time, we all have to put in a little effort now and again. So today I have taken a photo of myself straight out of the shower showing the 'real' me without make up, hair done or dressed up to the nines. I didn't even smile for this photo!

In my book Someone please help me, so I did I wrote from my worst time in where I felt I needed everyone else's approval before I could accept  myself, that is because I did not believe in myself. I had no real self-worth, how did I find it? Well it doesn't come from taking fabulous photos of yourself and looking good, that is just for appearance sake, I needed to look within and see the beauty that lay within me and start to let it shine through every pore of my being. 

No matter what anyone looks like on the outside, there is always an internal struggle in some form. The greatest philosophers in the world have written about this through the ages, the acceptance of self is our greatest challenge but also our greatest opportunity for learning who we are and who we want to be.

We are now dominated by social media images and positive quotes that tell you to be happy and smiling all the time, that is not real. We don't wake up happy, we have to choose to be that way. Happiness stems from the thoughts and feelings in each moment, the appreciation of what is without judgement. This also includes the feelings of anger and sadness, accepting them and allowing yourself to feel these emotions as they arise. But would you take a photo of yourself when you are crying your eyes out or screaming your head off and post on social media!? NO, you certainly would not, care would anyone see the 'real' you!/. 

I smile as I type this as I have often cried and looked at myself in the mirror, not a pretty sight let me tell you, but it is the realest me I will ever see, it is the me that is vulnerable, expressive and allowing myself to be who I am in that moment. None of us are ever going to be perfect as there is no such thing. None of us are going to be happy and positive all the time, or if you pretend to be, you are not being real with yourself or the world. 

When I wake up each morning, I will take 5 minutes looking in the mirror and just breathe deeply whilst focusing not on the 'image' of myself but on the core of who I am.

If you can look into your own eyes, even the sleepy ones, and tell yourself you are loved and accepted, you are off to a great start everyday. Don't get caught up in the lives of other people, that is their life. They may inspire you, but allow your dreams and passion to explode into the world in the only way you can, your way. 

Being true to yourself never goes out of style. 

It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are ~. e.e. cummings

 

Happy New Year

Love Sharon

 

Deepening your connection to Self & Spirit

Last weekend I had the privilege of taking my 15th group away on a weekend retreat to the beautiful Boghill Centre in Kilfenora in Co. Clare. Returning to the centre is like coming home for me, it is a place of warmth, comfort, peace and we are always welcomed with a warm embrace and nurtured by the surroundings and fabulous food all weekend. 

Our beautiful workshop space nestled in the trees 

Our beautiful workshop space nestled in the trees 

The theme for the retreat was deepening your connection to self and spirit, a theme that I was inspired to create seeing the amount of people who attend my client clinics or meditation groups and workshops who seem to have lost a sense of connection not only to themselves, but also to their surroundings and that includes the people they share it with. This also includes myself. We believe we are deeply connected as we move through life as such a fast pace, but it is only when we stop and listen, do we realise how far removed we are from truly understanding all that we are thinking and feeling. When you become more self-aware, you start to realise that you are not truly connected at all. We may have lost our sense of purpose, unable to feel a passion for what we are doing and life just seems to carry us along with no feeling of us being the creators of our destinies. 

 I feel that we are being guided more and more to reconnecting to our true selves, who we are now and learning to accept the present moment without judgement and learning to change the things we do not like one step at a time. But first we must sit and listen to our inner voice and what it is trying to tell us. This weekend allowed space and time for myself and the group to do just that, through meditation, mindful practices and also support work in the group. 

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When we allow ourselves to be immersed in the richness of the energy of any group, we start to open up and resonate with what others are feeling, it brings out so many feelings that when in a safe environment, that vulnerability is a strength in connection between our hearts and minds. Together we find solace in knowing that we are not alone in our fears and worries, our past traumas are familiar to others too, there is no shame in speaking your truth. In fact once you open up to your own truth, there is a freedom in energy that is palpable, others respond to you and a healing takes place that there are no words for, it is felt and seen by each person on a deeper level than ever before. Tears fall slowly down the cheeks, your breathing changes and you feel within the pit of your stomach a stirring that is rising to the surface, you are finally allowing yourself to break free from the restraints you had bound yourself to for far too long. It may have felt like you were keeping yourself safe and protecting yourself from what you most feared, but in fact you were only keeping it locked inside to grow bigger and stronger, believing that if you didn't look at it, feel it or understand it, it would just disappear. Only when we face our biggest fear, learn to befriend it and learn from it will be free of it. This is our truth, to reveal ourselves flaws and all, this is where our power lies in creating change within ourselves and others. When we truly connect to life, we connect to the wholeness of our spirit. 

This is when the true transformation takes place. You may think that one weekend couldn't possible help anyone with a life filled with pain and hurt but I have seen the biggest changes to people's mindsets within one single session of deep connection to self. Sometimes we are unaware of what the root cause of our issues may be and with support, you can get to the bottom of anything, but it has to be a choice made by the individual in that they want to create a change in their own life as they know there is so much else they have to offer the world.  They want to be part of it, to live it and to feel that they are too valued and accepted for who they are. We all deserve this but first you must commit to giving yourself the space and time to do so. It is not just for people that consider themselves spiritual, it is for everyone, a longing within your heart that calls out from the depths of your soul that you are more than your pain and sorrows that are buried deep within the caverns of your heart. It is a heavy weight to carry all by yourself, so in sharing and supporting each other through the process, we find ways to understand and accept how it all feels right now, we are not our past, we don't live there anymore, we can't change anything, only how we respond to our memories of it now. We transform how we react to the thoughts and beliefs that we once believed as our truth,  we start to remember that we are more than our past and we can become whomever we choose to be, but that starts with the acceptance of who we are now. In time we will be able to come out of our past cocoons and start to gently spread our wings, to be seen for who we truly are and take flight beyond where we once believed we could never go, past our own limitations.

To me, connecting to self and others in the vital ingredient to our well being. This weekend like many of my weekends, I have seen people transform in front of my eyes, I have seen them grow into their own hearts and allow themselves to be filled with hope and joy, to believe that they are stronger than they believed and that no matter what challenges they face in life, they now realise they have the inner strength and courage to face it. Retreats are not just to get away from reality, but to understand what your reality is and find ways in which you learn to cope with the many daily struggles we all face. In doing so, you allow yourself time to reconnect to that deeper part of you that wants to break out into the world and be seen. 

I am deeply grateful for my journey and in sharing it with others, I have learned that I am growing stronger each and every day, in turn I am helping others to find their strength which allows us all to shine our light in this world. If you only do one thing for yourself each day, let it be the most important thing in taking time to connect to you, you are so worth it. Keep things simple and find peace even in the midst of chaos, smile and know that this too will pass. 

 

With love & blessings to you all

Sharon